By Jessica Block |
Ah, Galentine’s Day. The closest real-life women will ever get to feeling like they are living in Barbie Land. It’s a day full of ladies supporting ladies, ovaries before brovaries, and uteruses before duderuses. Nothing makes a woman feel more supported than a Galentine’s Day brunch celebraish with her badass girlfriends (except maybe a good bra, but if you can have both then, girl, have both). So if you are wondering what to bring to brunch for your favorite gal pals this year, we’ve got you covered with this list of Galentine’s Day brunch foods, from the classics to some out-of-the-box ideas that just make sense. Because as our mother and savior Leslie Knope always says: “We need to remember what’s important in life: friends, waffles, and work. Or waffles, friends, and work. Doesn’t matter, but work is third.”
Amen.
- Krusteaz Belgian Waffles
There needed to be waffles on this list, so here you are…waffles. But not just any waffles. These are the Sporked crew’s favorite toaster waffles and they are as close to the real deal from JJ’s Diner as you can possibly get without going to a restaurant or buying a waffle iron. Editor-in-chief Justine Sterling noted that these Belgian waffles “taste so close to homemade—scratch that—restaurant-made waffles it is mind-blowing.” Get these for your girlies and they will be waffle-y happy about it.
Read the full ranking of the best frozen waffles
- Clover Sonoma Sweetened Whipped Topping
I mean, come on. Who celebrates a holiday created by the one and only Leslie Knope and disrespects the woman by having less than a metric sh*t ton of whipped cream on their waffles? Couldn’t be me. And it won’t be you either if you remember to pick up some whipped cream for your girls. We recommend Clover Sonoma whipped cream, which Sporked‘s Jordan Myrick called “incredibly rich and luxurious,” which, honestly, is really what you are looking for in a whipped cream. Put it on your waffles, your coffee, your best friend Margret—on Galentine’s Day (and any day, really) whipped cream belongs on everything.
Read the full ranking of the best canned whipped cream
- Escuminac Extra Rare Maple Syrup
These are your favorite girls—spring for the good stuff. You can this Escuminac maple syrup on Amazon and “the flavor is strong and totally authentically maple,” according to Jordan. Your friends will love it. Plus, the bottle looks extremely chic, and what’s better than some chic syrup for your favorite chic(k)s?
Read the full ranking of the best pancake syrup
- Supreme Totino’s Pizza Rolls
Unfortunately, Ben Wyatt eventually got a job, so he never got the chance to found the Low-Cal Calzone Zone restaurant. But don’t worry, you can make your own low-cal calzone zone this Galentine’s Day using none other than Totino’s Pizza Rolls. They aren’t really low-cal, per se, but they are mini and somewhat calzone-like and that’s not nothing. These make the perfect little appetizer to flip the script and feed your hungry gals—Totino’s are for everybody, not just ravenous teen boys who just skateboarded into their parents’ kitchen. Plus, the supreme ones are indeed just that: supreme. Jordan loved the complex mix of flavors, noting that “the mix of meats along with the green pepper and onion make a wonderful combination.” These actually taste like a supreme pizza, and your girlies deserve all those toppings.
Read our ranking of every Totino’s Pizza Rolls flavor
- Pederson’s Natural Farms No Sugar Added Hickory Smoked Uncured Bacon
Whether you are going on a Galentine’s Day hike or staying in and brunchin’ with the ladies, bacon is gonna be a hit. We already know how bacon tends to be received when it lands on the brunch table, and, according to Leslie Knope, bacon is also a fantastic trail snack. And who are we to argue with a woman who was once the Regional Director of the National Park Service Midwest Region? And this particular brand of bacon is truly the tastiest, with our team of tasters calling it “more complex tasting than other bacon brands on the market. It packs so much rich, unique bacon flavor into every slice.” Bring some of this to your gals this February and they’ll be bacon for more.
Read the full ranking of the best bacon
- S’mores (with Jet Puffed S’more Vanilla Marshmallows)
The Pawnee Goddesses are true feminist icons. And what do feminist icons eat for breakfast (besides misogynists)? S’MORES, that’s what. Women can do whatever they want and be whatever they want to be and sometimes that means being a badass who eats s’mores for breakfast. And if you are going to serve your favorite girls some s’mores at 11 a.m., they had better be amazing ones. These vanilla s’more-specific marshmallows from Jet-Puffed are going to get you there. Our tasting team called them “ethereal, square-shaped pillows with a lovely hint of vanilla flavor,” and if that doesn’t scream “Special Galentine’s Day Brunch S’more,” I don’t know what does.
Read the full ranking of the best marshmallows
- Simply Orange Pulp-Free Orange Juice
It is brunch, after all. Mix some of this, Sporked’s favorite orange juice, with ~whatever~ you think it would go best with, whether that’s champagne or vodka—beautiful-feminist-talented-fabulous-girlboss-sister-queen dealer’s choice.
Read the full ranking of the best orange juice
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About the Author
Jessica Block
Jessica Block is a freelance contributor to Sporked, a comedian, a baker, a food writer, and a firm believer that Trader Joe's may just be the happiest place on earth. She loves spicy snacks, Oreos, baking bread, teeny tiny avocados, and trying new foods whenever she can. Also, if you give her a bag of Takis she will be your best friend.
